Most of my great-grandparents immigrated from Denmark around the turn of the 20th century. They left a country that wrestled with a defining question: What do you do when the world you knew has changed—and you cannot simply recover what was lost?
A Danish Root for Thriving
That question had become especially sharp after Denmark’s defeat by Prussia and Austria in 1864. Denmark ceded Schleswig, Holstein, and Lauenburg, losing roughly 30-40% of the Danish monarchy’s territory. In the decades that followed over 300,000 Danes immigrated to the United States between 1870 and 1930 – including my great grandparents. During this period, a phrase came to symbolize a wider national impulse: “What was lost outwardly must be won inwardly.”
The history is more complicated than a single slogan, but the question underneath it still matters: When circumstances change around us, what must be strengthened within us?
That question feels increasingly relevant today. We cannot control every disruption, loss, or shift around us. But we can choose how we respond—what we carry forward, what future we move toward, what we learn, and what we do next.
Introducing TrivesLiv™
That is the idea behind what I call TrivesLiv. The name brings together two Danish words: trives, a verb meaning to thrive, flourish, or develop well; and liv, the Danish word for life.
TrivesLiv (pronounced Tree-vuhs-Leev) is the capacity to remain rooted in what has shaped us, hopeful about what can be, responsive to what we are learning, and aligned in how we act.
Thriving, in this sense, is not comfort, constant success, or avoiding difficulty. It is the capacity to stay grounded and keep becoming through change.
Know. Hope. Learn. Do.
TrivesLiv Practices
In my work with individuals, teams, and organizations, I see the capacity to thrive built through four interdependent practices:
- Know your story. Understand what has shaped you and how those experiences influence the way you lead today. TrivesLiv leaders examine both success and failure, naming the values, strengths, hardships, and purpose they carry into the room.
- What part of your story is shaping your leadership without your permission?
- Fuel hope. Cultivate a future worth moving toward. Hope is more than optimism; it gives direction and energy for action. It may be rooted in spiritual depth, meaningful aspiration, or a desire for transformation.
- What future are you actually leading yourself (or others) toward—and can they see themselves in it?
- Keep learning. Stay curious enough to be changed by what you encounter. Seek perspectives different from your own, test assumptions, pay attention to feedback, and adjust when reality challenges the story you have been telling yourself.
- Where has experience quietly become certainty—and certainty stopped your learning?
- Do what matters. Turn meaning and purpose into choices. TrivesLiv leaders align their story, hope, and learning with focused action—especially when the action requires courage, tradeoffs, or letting go of something that no longer serves the future.
- What does your calendar, budget, or attention reveal about what actually matters to you?
My great grandparents probably didn’t use these words, but I think they embodied these practices as they found a new life here. Their story was about the journey, they fueled hope with their faith and aspirations, they continued to learn, and they did the things that mattered to move toward a future that embraced the inward resolve.
Why the Rhythm Matters
These practices form a rhythm and they require similar attention.
- Story without hope can leave us anchored to the past.
- Hope without learning can become wishful thinking.
- Learning without action becomes insight without impact.
- Action without story or purpose can become motion without meaning.
Thriving becomes more rooted when the four practices keep informing one another: we know what has shaped us, we fuel a future worth pursuing, we keep learning from what is changing, and we do what matters.
Which practice is strongest in your leadership right now—and which one are you ignoring or avoiding?
Practices, Not a Promise
TrivesLiv practices are not a promise that leaders or organizations will always flourish. Conditions matter. Systems matter. Disruption is real. The invitation is not to pretend otherwise; it is to build the inner and collective capacity to respond with greater clarity, hope, learning, and purposeful action to navigate more effectively.
Reflection – and coaching – can create space for that work. The responsibility remains with the individual or organization: to notice the rhythm, name what is out of alignment, and choose the next faithful action.
Where is your rhythm holding—and where is it asking for attention? That may be where your next season of thriving begins.
In the next four posts, we’ll explore each practice more deeply—starting with the one that anchors the others: knowing your story. Before the next post, choose one of the questions above to honestly reflect on – and notice what surprises you.
