Part five of the TrivesLiv™ series

I made my list for the day. The lawn needed mowing before the rain rolled in. The garage needed organizing so we could get the cars back in after a project. There were errands to run before our trip. And I wanted to get in a bike ride.

I started with the ride. The weather was perfect, so I went a little farther than I planned. On the way home, something felt off in the shifting. And 90 minutes later, I was walking out of the bike shop.

You can see where this is going.

By the end of the day, half the list was done—and not the half that mattered most. None of it was bad. The ride wasn’t wrong. But stretching it out was a choice I didn’t notice I was making.

That’s how drift works. I’ve seen it in meetings, in projects, and in my own habits. We start with good intentions. Then we gravitate toward what we enjoy, follow a distraction that seems connected but isn’t, or turn to the fire right in front of us. It’s rarely one bad decision. It’s usually a string of small choices that we barely notice as they pull us from what matters.

Most days, the cost of drift is half a list incomplete. But over time those small choices can take us further off course.

A Crossing Changes the Question

My great-grandparents, who I introduced at the beginning of this series, immigrated here over 125 years ago. When you are leaving Denmark for a country you have never seen—carrying what you can and leaving the rest—you can’t drift for long. What mattered was clear because the stakes were: money for passage, food and shelter, strength for the journey. Courage. The humility to accept help and begin again. A faith that God would provide in the middle of the unknown.

Most of us don’t live with those same stakes, though some do. But every generation makes choices that shape the circumstances of the next. Someday, someone will live inside the impact of my choices—both intentional and unintentional.

That reshapes the question for me. Not only, “What matters today?” but:

What are you doing now that someone you love may one day inherit?

A Neighbor on the Timeline

In Luke 10, an expert in the law asks Jesus, “Who is my neighbor?” Jesus answers with a story. A man is beaten and left on the side of the road. A priest passes by. Then a Levite. Then a Samaritan stops, binds the man’s wounds, and pays for his care.

The Samaritan recognized the interruption as the thing that mattered most.

That is the hard part of this practice. Not every interruption is drift. The bike shop was. The man on the road was not. Doing what matters asks for discernment: Which interruptions pull us away from our purpose, and which ones are our purpose arriving unannounced?

Jesus answered, “Who is my neighbor?” with a man on the road. I wonder if the answer also includes the people further down the road—the ones who will live inside what we choose today. Our neighbor isn’t only across the street. Our neighbor is also down the timeline.

Where the Practices Meet

Knowing our story showed us the winding road behind us. Fueling hope gave us a horizon worth walking toward. Learning, I wrote last time, is how we keep holding the pen.

Doing what matters is when the pen finally moves.

Together, these practices move us from thinking about what we want, to intentionally shaping it.

In the first post, I wrote, “Action without story or purpose can become motion without meaning.” The reverse is true, too. Story, hope, and learning without action remain simply good ideas. This practice is where they become a life.

Doing What Matters Personally

• Audit your calendar. Look back over the last two weeks and consider where your time went. Which activities moved you toward what matters? Which consumed time without contributing much? Which commitments deserve another look? Do the same with your spending and routines. Are they telling the story you want to live—or has the story you tell yourself drifted from your intent?
• Practice letting go. Try to identify some “stop, start, continue” practices. Sometimes it takes more courage to stop something than to start something new. There are good things, and there are better things—and the good ones are the hardest to set down.
• Name one next faithful step. Not a five-year plan. One step this week that brings your story, your hope, and what you are learning a little closer together.

For Leaders and Organizations

• Read your budget as a mission statement. Do the resources you allocate reflect the story you tell, the horizon you hope toward, and what you are learning?
• Sunset something. Name one program, meeting, or process that no longer moves you toward your intended future. What would it take to let it go and reinvest that time and those resources into something that does?
• Ask the inheritance question together. What will the next generation of staff, leaders, and the people we serve inherit from the decisions we are making today?

The Rhythm Continues

TrivesLiv practices are not steps to complete. They are a rhythm. Each thing we do writes new pages in our story, and the cycle begins again whenever we pause to reflect.

A simple check-in can keep the rhythm going—monthly, quarterly, or whenever a season shifts:

• Know: What chapter am I in, and what is it teaching me?
• Hope: What horizon am I walking toward?
• Learn: What am I learning that is changing me or moving me deeper into hope?
• Do: What is my next faithful step?

Use it on your own, with your team, or with a trusted friend. And if you’d like a thinking partner as you find your rhythm, I’d welcome the conversation.

Back to the Crossing

I don’t know how far down the timeline my great-grandparents were looking. I suspect most days they were simply trying to take the next faithful step. But I know I am living inside what they chose to do.

Their decision was an act of hope. Their journey required learning along the way. And their choices created a life and a legacy that continue to reach into mine.

At some point, you were given something you are living inside of today.

What are you doing now that someone you love may one day inherit?

Questions for Reflection

• What did your calendar say you valued last week?
• What good things might you need to set down to make room for something better?
• When has an interruption turned out to be the thing that mattered most?
• What is one next faithful step you will take this week?

Thriving isn’t about getting everything right or doing everything on your list. It’s about living with greater awareness and intention, making choices that bring what matters into how we live and lead.